As I walked this morning on the rail trail, deep in my own thoughts about which way to go and how best to serve God, I was reminded that my thoughts needed to be on God and his guidance. After all, how many times has God’s loving words proven true when whispered in my heart: “I know the plans I have for you…”
So how was I reminded that my thoughts were misplaced?
Lost in my own darkness, I suddenly noticed a ray of light shining on my path. The sun had broken over the mountains. I stopped and smiled. I remembered a time long ago–so it seems–when the late February sun broke through the bleak of winter, making my heart fill with hope once again.
I was on a retreat just a week after my I buried my boyfriend. Still reeling from the shock of his accident and slowly coming to grips that he was gone, I heeded my friends’ advice to come on the retreat. I really just wanted to be alone. But I went, and spent time alone there in a crowd.
While others were gathered in prayer one afternoon, I snuck off to walk in the woods. The snow was still on the ground, although patches of brown peeked through here and there. I stopped to sit on a log. It was the perfect place to breakdown and weep. And so I broke and wept.
I felt alone, confused and so unsure of the future. What was next? What was I to do? My future looked so uncertain.
As my head hung low and the tears slowed their pace, I sat still and numb. My eyes were closed but suddenly I felt a strange warmth. It grew stronger. With my head still hanging low, I opened my eyes to see a ray of light streaming down upon the ground in front me. I looked up towards the sky and noticed the sun breaking through the clouds.
For I know the plans I have for you…I heard God whisper…
God is whispering the same promise still.
God’s light will always break through and shine. Always.
I continued to walk this time with thoughts on the goodness of God.
I wake up to a cold wintery Valentine’s Day morning. The snow is more than a foot high and I am wondering whether or not to go for a walk on the rail trail. My snowshoes are broken. The strap snapped in half and so walking in this amount of snow without them will be a workout indeed. Hmmm…I could use such a workout. I have been tempted by one too many chocolate hearts lately.
For now, though, I’ve decided to do something radical. I’ve decided to stop the decision making process. I don’t need to figure out if I have time for one more cup of coffee or if I want oatmeal or eggs for breakfast or whether or not to walk in the snow.
I have decided instead to just to sit in the quiet of this sacred morning moment and be with the one who loves me the most–to be with the one who loves me completely.
It’s Valentine’s Day. And while hearts and chocolate and sappy sentiments of love are nice, I know in my life I want the real love that comes from above. The love that heals. The love that strengthens. The love that lifts you when you are down. The love of one who seeks justice for you when life is unfair. The love of one who advocates for you when your voice is not heard. The love of who make a way forward when there seems to be nothing but roadblocks set by hardened hearts. I want the one who sees you at your worst and still whispers to your troubled soul, “I am here. I love you always.”
I want, no I need, to be in the presence of God.
The other day I found myself writing to a friend telling her how tired I was. I had been working extra hours freelance writing, leaving little time for prayer. Before I realized it, these words were coming to the screen of the computer: I just want to make myself a cup of hot cocoa and read the Bible. I have actually been craving God’s word lately.
God’s word. That is a good thing to crave. And when your soul starts hungering for it, you know something is lacking. And so…
May this Valentine’s Day, you take a sacred moment to be with the one who loves you completely and unconditionally. May you take time to acknowledge this love in your life. And may you whisper the sweetest words God can ever hear from us: “I love you too.”
May you crave God as much as God craves for you.
Jesus says to let our light shine, but how often do we hide it under a bushel? Come and reflect with me here at The Old Stone Well Farm on the importance of letting the Christ light shine. Blessings!